“From Nothing to Everything: What Your Kids Really Need From You”

When you come from nothing, you want to give your kids everything.

The better clothes. The bigger birthdays. The toys, the tech, the comfort you never had.

But one day, maybe after a tantrum or a moment of entitlement, a realization hits:

Giving them everything may teach them… nothing.

I welcome you to one of the biggest parenting paradoxes.

🎢 The Cycle We Want to Break

Many new parents—especially those who grew up with hardship—start with a powerful mission: My kids will never feel what I felt. That drive is noble. But in protecting them from struggle, we often shield them from the very things that shaped us: resilience, gratitude, resourcefulness.

💬 What Kids Learn When You Give Too Much

Instant Gratification: They may expect things without effort. Entitlement Over Appreciation: When everything is available, nothing feels special. Low Resilience: If life is always padded, they may stumble harder at the first real obstacle.

💡 What Kids Really Need From You

Limits, Not Luxury Boundaries teach self-control. A “no” today might build stronger decision-making tomorrow. Effort Over Ease Let them earn some rewards. Doing chores, saving for something they want, or even handling disappointment—these shape character. Presence Over Presents Your attention, your stories, your time—these are worth more than the latest gadget. The Power of “Not Yet” Delayed gratification is one of the strongest predictors of future success. Teach them the value of waiting and working. Grit Over Gifts A child who knows how to try again is more powerful than a child who never has to.

👫 For New Couples: Build a Unified Front

Talk Early About Values: Are you aligned on discipline, spending, and reward systems? Model the Lessons: Your kids will watch how you save, argue, apologize, and hustle. Avoid the “Guilt Gift” Trap: If you’re busy, don’t replace presence with presents. Even 15 intentional minutes a day go further than another toy.

💛 Give Them Roots AND Wings

It’s okay to want more for your kids. Just remember: “More” doesn’t mean material. Give them stability, love, guidance, and the tools to build their own success.

Let them struggle a little. Let them learn.

Because one day, when they stand tall on their own, you’ll know you gave them everything that actually matters.

By H Nurhak